The WRITE of Her Life!
Julia’s eyes lit up and her voice exuded confidence when she talked about fitness and showed others how to set the machines. As a gym floor attendant, she had just started her own personal training business. She had no problem passing on her hard-earned knowledge and assistance but when it came to telling a potential client about her training services, she just couldn’t gather up the nerve.
She wanted to find a way to be more confident, know what to say to people, and how to present her new training service to others. Yet when she tried, she stumbled through the words and before she could get them out, people were already telling her no and she continued to give away her personal training skills.
Amidst crocodile tears, Julia told me that she did not graduate high school. Then she married young and spent many years caring for her children and taking them to work with her. Janitorial work was her job. She gained that employment after many failed interviews and her self esteem wilted away. The message, “You’re no good. No one wants you.” was what she heard repeatedly as she was turned down job after job.
I worked with her for a year. It all started with the words that she told herself. The words that she heard from those who told her that she was not worthy were allowed to play in her mind repeatedly. Together, we rewrote her story. As typing was a skill she did not acquire, I had her type out her story on the computer. I asked her to write about herself from my eyes. “But you view me in such a great way” was her cry. I told her that I view her in a realistic way.
Day by day and month by month, she poked at the keyboard, typing out her story again but this time, in a more positive, realistic manner. During each biweekly session with Julia, I directed her to locate her strengths. At first she said that were none. I told her to explore and refused to move on until she could see what others see when they asked her for fitness advice.
As she rewrote her life, she found the right words to use for her biography, her introduction, and a way to promote her new business. She found a way to help others by offering them her personal training services. Julia is now a successful personal trainer with many clients. She was also able to do something else that she had always dreamed of which was to type her husband a love letter and e-mail it to him as he had no idea that she learned how to type and use the computer.
To this day, I still get cards and letters from Julia….